发音：美式发音 语速：150词/分钟 使用方法：精听+角色扮演
可爱早熟的孩子Jake,生活颓废又幼稚的伯父Charlie,婚姻失败的保守爸爸Alan,无比强势又不甘寂寞的奶奶Evelyn,还有无数巨星的主演和客串……这些人的优质演出,加上彪悍的、机智无比的剧本,造就了这部CBS收视率达80%的金牌喜剧《好汉两个半》。从2003年开播至今已经迈入了第七季,它的收视率居高不下,一直排在全美收视榜前三位,是CBS目前主打的情景喜剧王,已获得1项艾美奖,7项其他各类大奖,以及包括2项金球奖提名在内的18项各类提名。
本集故事说到,Alan被第二任妻子赶出了家门,还耗尽所有财产交付赡养费,像上次被第一任妻子赶出家门一样,他又回到了哥哥Charlie的家,但是他这次被打击得不行,Charlie只好极不情愿地把强势而又刻薄的妈妈搬动来帮忙劝Alan,妈妈的当头棒喝警醒了沉溺于痛苦中的Alan。
(Knocking)
Charlie: Hey, the kid and I are going to the movies. You wanna come?
Alan: No, thanks.
Charlie: Can I get you something to eat?
Alan: No.
Charlie: Something to drink?
Alan: No.
Charlie: How about a bottle of 1)scotch and a hooker?
Alan: Just wanna be alone.
Charlie: Well, you don’t need my help for that. ①That’s your home run swing.
Alan: Just close the door on the way out.
Charlie: Fine. I’ll close it, then I’ll nail it shut, plaster it over and hang a picture of something a little more cheerful, like a plane crash.
(Knocking)
Jake: Dad?
Alan: Yeah?
Jake: Uncle Charlie’s gonna take me back to Mom’s now.
Alan: Well, come in here and say goodbye!
Jake: Bye.
Alan: That’s it? Come here and give your old dad a hug.
(Jake goes over to hug his dad.) That’s better.
Jake: You still depressed?
Alan: Oh no, no. I’m fine. Just taking a little nap.
Jake: You’ve been napping for two days.
Alan: I’m getting old, Jake. Old people nap a lot. ②It’s kind of a dry run for death.
Jake: Okay. Well, see you.
Alan: See you.
Jake: Hey, dad?
Alan: Yeah?
Jake: Even though Mom stopped loving you and Kandy (Alan’s second ex-wife) stopped loving you, you don’t have to worry about me.
Alan: Thanks, pal.
Jake: You’re my dad. I pretty much gotta love you.
Charlie: So, is he still curled up like a cocktail shrimp?
Jake: Yup.
Charlie: Okay. I am running out of patience with this guy. I’ve had relationships end and I don’t go crawling into bed over it. Alright, I didn’t wanna have to do this, but desperate times call for desperate measures.
Berta (Charlie’s housekeeper): What’re you gonna do?
Charlie: Something I’d hoped I’d never have to.
Rose (Charlie’s friend): You don’t mean…?
Charlie: I’m afraid so. …Hello? Mom?
(敲门声)
查理:嘿,我准备和孩子去看电影,你和我们一起去吗?
艾伦:不了,谢谢。
查理:要不要我帮你带点儿吃的?
艾伦:不用了。
查理:喝的呢?
艾伦:不用。
查理:那来瓶苏格兰威士忌,再召个妓女怎么样?(这个估计能刺激一下他。)
艾伦:我只想一个人待着。
查理:那就不用我帮忙了。你干这事是最拿手的了。
艾伦:出去时把门关上。
查理:好,我会把门关上,然后用钉子钉死,糊上水泥,再挂上一幅稍微喜庆一点的图画,比如飞机坠毁什么的。(看飞机坠毁都比看你现在这样子好看!)
(敲门声)
杰克:老爸?
艾伦:什么事?
杰克:查理伯父现在要送我回妈妈那
里了。
艾伦:这样啊,那进来跟我说再见吧!
杰克:再见。
艾伦:这样就完了?过来给老爸抱一个。
(杰克走过去趴在他爸爸身上,抱了
一下。)这样好多了。
杰克:你还在难过吗?
艾伦:哦,没有,没有。我很好。只是想小憩一下而已。
杰克:你都已经小憩两天了。
艾伦:我老了,杰克。老人是经常打盹的,这就像是在为死亡做演练。
杰克:好吧,那再见。
艾伦:再见。
杰克:嘿,老爸?
艾伦:什么事?
杰克:就算妈妈不再爱你,康迪(艾伦闪婚闪离的前妻)不再爱你了,对于我你还是可以放心的。
艾伦:谢了,伙计。
杰克:你是我老爸,我好像必须得爱你。
查理:怎么样?他还是像醉虾一样缩成一团?
杰克:没错。
查理:好啦。我对这个家伙失去耐心了。我以前也试过跟别人分手,但我从未试过赖在床上来解决问题。好吧,我并不想那么做的,但非常时期需要非常疗法。
贝塔(查理的管家):你要做什么?
查理:做一些我希望永远不会做的事。
罗丝(查理的朋友):你不是要……?
查理:恐怕是的。……你好?妈妈?
(Knocking)
Alan: Oh, God, what 2)plague have you set upon me now?
Evelyn: Alan, it’s Mommy.
Alan: (speaks as an aside) Good one!
Evelyn: Oh, my poor darling! How are you holding up?
Alan: How do you think? I blew another marriage, I wasted all my money, I’m a complete and utter failure.
Evelyn: Oh, sweetie, you just can’t see the big picture, can you?
Alan: What big picture?
Evelyn: Every foolish choice you’ve made, every wasted opportunity, every 3)hapless misstep in your sad 4)misbegotten life…
Alan: I know. I know. It’s an opportunity to learn and grow.
Evelyn: Well, perhaps, but, more importantly, it’s a reflection on me.
Alan: Always good to see you, Mom.
Evelyn: I’m not finished.
Alan: Of course not.
Evelyn: There is a silver lining in this dark cloud.
Alan: I can’t wait to hear about it.
Evelyn: You’re all alone, you’re penniless, and you have no prospects…
Alan: Are we at the silver lining part yet?
Evelyn: Yes! Short of 5)contracting a flesh-eating disease, things couldn’t possibly get any worse. ③You’ve hit rock bottom! You have nowhere to go
but up!
Alan: You know what? You’re right. You’re self-obsessed, insensitive and soul-sucking, but you’re right. I’ve stared into the 6)abyss and I’m still here. I…I…I…I’ve had my heart shattered and then shattered again and I’m still here. I’ve taken every piece of crap that life could throw at me and I’m still here!
Evelyn: Well, we don’t have to turn this into an evening with 7)Liza Minnelli. Now, get washed, get dressed, get on with your life!
Alan: Okay!
Evelyn: And remember; no matter what, I’ll always
love you.
Alan: I know. Thanks.
Evelyn: Don’t thank me, sweetheart, I’m your mother! I have to love you.
(敲门声)
艾伦:哦,上帝,这次你又打算给我什么灾难?
艾芙莲:艾伦,我是妈妈。
艾伦:(自嘲)很不错啊!
艾芙莲:哦,我亲爱的小可怜!你怎么能这样呢?
艾伦:你觉得呢?我又搞砸了一次婚姻,花光了我所有的钱,我是一个完全彻底的失
败者。
艾芙莲:哦,亲爱的,你只是没有看出大方向而已,不是吗?
艾伦:什么大方向?
艾芙莲:每次你做过的错误选择,每次浪费的机会,每次倒霉的失足,在你悲惨的未婚有子生活中……(怎么变成自己在忆苦思甜了?)
艾伦:我知道,我知道,都是一次学习和成长的机会。
艾芙莲:嗯,或许是,但最重要的是,你这样做都有我的影子。(老妈永远第一个想起的都是自己。)
艾伦:看见你总是那么的好,妈妈。
艾芙莲:我还没说完呢。
艾伦:当然没说完。
艾芙莲:在这乌云密布当中还是有一线生机的。
艾伦:我真是等不及听你继续了。
艾芙莲:你孑然一身,一贫如洗,前途渺茫……
艾伦:我们说到“一线生机”那一部分
了吗?
艾芙莲:是的!你除了还没被诊断出得了(无可救药的)“食肉症”,境况已经不可能更糟糕的了。你已经跌到了谷底!除了站起来你别无选择!
艾伦:你知道吗?你说的对。你自我感觉良好、麻木迟钝、冷酷无情,但你说的对。我一直凝视着深渊,但我是好好的;我我我的心都裂成碎片了,然后又再次裂成碎片,但我还是好好的;我接受了生活扔给我的所有垃圾,但我还是好好的!(不自主地开始他的本能——絮絮叨叨了。)
艾芙莲:那我们也不需要把这变成是丽莎·明尼拉之夜。(拜托,也别太夸张了好不?戏过了。)现在,去洗个澡,换件衣服,继续你的生活!
艾伦:好的!
艾芙莲:还有你要记住:不管怎么样,我总是爱你的。
艾伦:我知道,谢谢。
艾芙莲:不用谢我,亲爱的,我是你的母亲!我不得不爱你。
Smart Sentences
① That’s your home run swing. 你干这事是最拿手的了。
home run swing: something that exactly succeeds in achieving its goal(达到目标的关键,最拿手的)。例如:
Tears are always my home run swing whenever I fight with my boyfriend.
我跟男朋友吵架的时候,眼泪总是最好的武器。
② It’s kind of a dry run for death. 这就像是在为死亡做
演练。
dry run: a trial exercise, a rehearsal(演习,排练)。例如:
Chasing the bus every day is the best dry run for a fire drill.
每天追公共汽车就是最好的消防演习。
③ You’ve hit rock bottom! 你已经跌到了谷底!
hit rock bottom: reach the worst possible state(最低点)。例如:
Having lost my laptop after failing three subjects, I’d hit rock bottom.
在三门课不及格之后,我又丢了手提电脑,我的情绪沉到了最低点。