文字难度：★★☆
I feel having children spread out over so many years gives me a wonderful opportunity to observe a child’s changing views on all aspects of life. It is interesting to see how their ideas and perceptions transform as they develop.
It seems my children found everything new and exciting when they were young but as they moved into their teens and beyond they seemed to become more practical as they learned more about the world around them and what it would take to live their dreams. There is nothing wrong with that but I wonder if they are 1)selling themselves short or are just plain 2)inert. I wonder if somewhere along the line my husband and I, the society they grew up in, or a little of both have failed them in some way.
My youngest daughter, Elizabeth, who is seven, has so many jobs she would like to pursue. Everything from working at a gas station, because she likes the smell of gasoline to becoming a horse trainer, even though we don’t own any horses and she has never been around them much. She wanted to be a dancer but became 3)apathetic towards 4)tap and ballet classes when she discovered it took a lot of practice. Right now, she loves Girl Scouts and really enjoys it.
Seven year olds are not practical and shouldn’t be at this age. They should 5)test the waters and try any 6)venue that is appealing to them. As parents, even though we may not always have the finances to aid them in their 7)callings, we can give them our support and check all possible ways so that they can get an idea what that occupation 8)entails.
My middle daughter, Katie, who is almost 15, is all consumed with being a teenager accompanied by the 9)impending driver’s license just 10)around the corner. When she was Elizabeth’s age she wanted to be a marine biologist and work with the whales and dolphins but she hated taking care of the pets we had at home.
我觉得自己的孩子分布在不同年龄层给了我一个极好的机会观察一个孩子如何对生活方方面面不断改变着看法。观察他们的想法和观念如何随着他们的成长而改变,这是很有趣的。
我的孩子还小的时候似乎感觉一切都很新鲜、令人兴奋,但当他们成长到十几岁以后,随着对身边的世界以及实现梦想的条件有了更多的了解,他们变得越来越现实。这种转变并没问题,但我想知道他们是否低估了自己,或者纯粹只是惰性使然。我想知道,在我和丈夫、孩子们成长的社会环境这两大因素中,是否有其一或其二误了对他们的栽培。
我最小的女儿伊丽莎白今年七岁,她有太多想从事的工作——从在加油站工作(她喜欢汽油的气味)到成为一个驯马师,尽管我们没有养马,她也没常呆在马身边。她想成为一个舞者,但当发现要花大量时间来练习后,就对上踢踏舞和芭蕾舞课失去了兴趣。目前,她爱上了女童子军训练,而且真的很享受。
七岁不是个“现实的”年龄,这个年龄的孩子也不该“现实”。他们应该对那些吸引自己的东西多做尝试。而作为父母,即使我们并非总能在金钱上支持他们随心所欲地想试就试,我们仍能给予他们支持,寻求各种可能的途径使他们了解那个工作意味着要承担什么职责。
我二女儿卡蒂差不多十五岁了,眼下一心想着快到手的驾照,到时可以摇身变成一个威风少年。当她还是伊丽莎白那个年纪时,她想成为一个海洋生物学家,和鲸、海豚一起工作,但她讨厌照看家里的宠物。
As soon as Katie started high school, she tells me she feels pressured and is 11)grasping at careers that will take as little amount of schooling and money as possible. So I guess marine biologist is off her list. Right now she is considering 12)flower arranging and a 13)veterinarians assistant. Again the aspect of animal care 14)comes into play.
Mari Ann, my oldest daughter, just turned twenty. She loved to dance and still does but she stopped lessons in middle school. She always loved organizing and heading projects. By the time she got into high school she announced she wanted to become a professional tourist. I asked her how she would finance her travels and she answered me with, “I’ll take pictures, Mom!” Mari Ann never seemed interested in photography and never took one photography class in high school. After graduating she was eager to get a taste of adulthood and decided to wait before starting college. She tried a number of jobs and wound up as an assistant manager at a discount card store and seems relatively happy.
Mari Ann also feels that any career that requires a college degree and pays less than $25,000 a year is not worth the amount of time and money spent. On the other hand, I feel that if an occupation is something you will enjoy doing for the rest of your life then it is worth it. I guess Mari Ann is more practical than me.
Our children were taught that once they started something they had to finish it. They are not quitters but they have become non-joiners. Deep down inside we all know the easy way out is not the best way ninety-nine percent of the time and anything really worthwhile takes hard work and devotion. Then why are so many people taking the 15)quick fix more and more? Reflecting back on it now, I see there are many factors that have come into play. The fast paced and instant 16)gratification society that we all live in is truly 17)taking its toll on children and adults alike. If you are hungry there is fast food. If you want to buy something there are credit cards. If you are sick of looking at your spouse’s face there is no fault divorce. It has become a way of life even if you, as parents, have tried your best to instill commitment, dedication and good hard work ethics.
The “have to have it and get it now” mentality is very appealing on the surface. However, in the long run it leaves you feeling unfulfilled, 18)fat and financially over extended. No wonder why people feel so depressed about their lives.
In some ways it seems like a million years ago and in other ways it seems like it was just a blink of an eye that I held each one of my girls in my arms. Newborns are so sweet and innocent with the whole world lying at their feet. I remember asking myself what would their special contributions to the world be or, in other words, what would they do with their lives? Where would their individual likes and dislikes take them and how would their father and myself guide them on their journeys? Maybe if material things weren’t becoming easier and easier to acquire the wrong way, then perhaps the spiritual side of life would own its rightful appointment in the scheme of life.
I want my children to learn that everything has a price and eventually it will have to be paid. There are no easy ways out in life. When they fully understand that, then this Mom won’t be so worried about her children’s vocations in life.
卡蒂刚读中学时就告诉我她感觉到有压力,且正着眼于那些尽可能不要求学历,资金投入也不大的职业。所以我猜“海洋生物学家”这个职业已经不在她的清单上了。眼下,她正在考虑花艺和兽医助理这两种工作。又回归到照看动物这个方面来。
我最大的女儿玛丽·安刚满二十岁。她从过去一直到现在都喜欢跳舞,但她念中学时就不再上舞蹈课了。她一直喜欢组织和牵头开展一些活动。她上中学时就说她想成为一个职业旅行家。我问她旅行的钱从哪来。她回答说:“妈妈,我可以拍照!”玛丽·安似乎从未对摄影产生兴趣,读中学时也从未上过一堂摄影课。中学毕业后,她渴望一尝成人的滋味,决定推迟读大学的计划。她尝试了一些工作,最后成为了一间打折卡商店的助理,似乎干得挺开心。
玛丽·安还觉得要求大学学历,而年薪低于2.5万美元(约17.1万元)的工作不值得花时间和金钱去做。另一方面,我觉得如果某个工作是你余生都喜欢干的,那就值得。我猜玛丽·安比我更现实。
我们教育孩子一旦开始做某件事就不得半途而废。她们不是“半途而废者”,但却变成了“不参与者”。从深层来说,我们都知道在99%的情况下,轻松的捷径并不是最佳出路,而真正有价值的工作都需要我们下苦功,努力投入。那为什么那么多人解决起问题来越来越贪求权宜之计呢?现在回想一下,我明白这是很多因素造成的。我们生活在一个快节奏且讲求即时满足的社会,这给孩子和大人都带来了负面影响。饿了,有快餐;想买东西,有信用卡;厌倦了另一半的面孔,有“无过失离婚”。这已成为一种生活方式,即使你作为父母,已经尽力向孩子灌输责任感、奉献精神以及刻苦工作的良好职业道德。
“必须拥有且必须马上拥有”的思想表面上很诱人。然而,从长远来看,这会让你感觉不充实,虚浮,入不敷出。怪不得人们对自己的人生感觉如此沮丧。
回想孩子们当年的襁褓岁月,有时候感觉似乎是一百万年前的事,有时又似乎只是弹指之间。新生儿如此甜美天真,整个世界匍匐于他们脚下。我记得我曾问自己,她们将对世界有何贡献,或者换句话说,她们将怎么度过自己的人生?她们的个人喜好将使他们成为怎样的人?沿途,父母该如何指引她们?也许,如果物质并不那么容易获得,那么或许精神世界应该名正言顺地在人生中占有一席之位。
我希望我的孩子们明白,一切都有代价,最终都得付出。人生无易事。当她们完全领悟了这点,那么我这个母亲就不会那么担心孩子的职业发展问题了。
