Examine Your Thought Soundtrack[在头脑里一直响起的声音]
聆听自己的心声
Now on to what you think: consider how you're explaining the rejection to yourself. Are you being too hard on yourself? It's natural to wonder, “Why did this happen?” When you give yourself an explanation, be careful to stick to the facts.
接下来要看看你的想法：想一下你是如何向自己解释这次被拒绝的事实的。你是否对自己太过严厉？有“为什么会这样？”的想法很正常。在向自己作出解释时，注意只讲事实。
Tell yourself: “I got turned down for prom because the person didn't want to go with me.” Don't tell yourself:“I got turned down because I'm not attractive” or “I'm such a loser.” These aren't facts. If put-down[贬低，贬损] thoughts like these start creeping into your mind, shut them down.
告诉自己：“我邀请别人去舞会但被拒绝了，因为那个人不想跟我去。”别对自己说：“我被拒绝是因为我不够吸引力”或“我真失败”。这些都不是事实。这类贬低性想法一旦开始钻进你的脑袋，要马上把它们扑灭。
Self-blaming or put-down thinking can exaggerate[夸大] our faults and lead us to believe stuff that simply isn't true. If you start blaming yourself for the rejection or put yourself down, you can start believing you'll always be rejected. Thoughts like, “I'll never get a date” or “no one will ever like me” amplify[放大] a simple rejection to disaster level. Rejection can hurt a lot and can be terribly disappointing, but it's not the end of the world.
自责或贬低性的想法会夸大我们的缺点，让我们相信那些不真实的事情。如果由于被拒绝而开始责备或贬低自己，你可能会觉得自己永远都会被拒绝。像“永远没有人会和我约会”或“没有人会喜欢我”等想法将一次普通的拒绝放大到灾难性的层面。被拒绝不好受，也可能让人失望透顶，但这不是世界末日。
Keep Things in Perspective[正确地]
正确对待事物
Tell yourself: “Okay, so I got rejected this time. Maybe next time I'll get a ‘yes.' ”
对自己说：“好吧，这次我被拒绝了，也许下一次我会得到肯定的答案呢。”
Think about what you're good at and what's good about you. Remember times when you've been accepted, when someone told you “yes.” Think of all the people who like you and support you.
想想你擅长的东西和自己的优点。回想别人接受你、对你说“好的”时的情景。想想喜欢并支持你的人。
Give yourself credit[赞扬] for trying. You took a risk—good for you. Remind yourself that you can handle the rejection. Even though you were turned down now, there will be another opportunity, another time. Get philosophical[达观的]: Sometimes things happen for reasons we don't always understand.
表扬自己曾经尝试过。你作出过尝试——好样的。提醒自己你能够直面拒绝。虽然现在被拒绝了，但还有另一个机会，下一次时机。达观一点：有些事情就是特别莫名其妙。
Use Rejection to Your Advantage
变劣势为优势
A rejection is a chance to consider if there are things we can work on. Think about whether there's room for improvement or if your goals were higher than your skills.
被拒绝是一个机会，让我们思考是否要采取一些措施。想想是否有进步的空间，或者你的目标是否超出你的能力。
If your skills weren't strong enough this time, maybe you need to work on your game, your studies, or whatever it takes to improve your chances of getting accepted next time. Use the rejection as an opportunity for self-improvement.
如果这次你的能力不足，也许你要在比赛、学习或任何有助于下次成功的事情上加把劲。将被拒绝当成是自我提升的机会。
Sometimes a rejection is a hard reality check[提醒人面对现实的事件]. But if you approach[动手处理] it right, it could help nudge[轻推] you in a direction that turns out to be the perfect fit for your talents, personality, and all the great things that make you who you are.
有时候，被拒绝就是让人面对现实的残酷警钟。但如果你处理得当，它能帮你找到一个新的方向，你也许会发现这个方向最适合发展自己的才能、个性以及各种长处。